37% American

You Are 37% American

America: You don't love it or want to leave it. But you wouldn't mind giving it an extreme make over. On the 4th of July, you'll fly a freak flag instead... And give Uncle Sam a sucker punch!

How American Are You?

I ignored the part of my brain that's responsible for rational, critical thought, took the test again, and got about 95%. After slamming a half dozen shots, I got 100%.

If you're 100% American (according to this test), The First Amendment isn't right but the Second is Sacred Writ, you'd rather eat at chain restaurants than at home, Canadians are Americans in training, beer should taste like cold piss, you think the Army is terrific and we should be killing more brown and yellow people, you drive a new car and you're up to your eyeballs in debt, you hardly ever vote if at all (at least not since you voted for Reagan), you like men and cars on steroids colliding. Even though you think anyone not a mindless conformist is a traitor, you love America because here you can be free.

There's one question wrong: You have to know that there are four states that begin with a 'W' (Washington, West Virginia, Wisconson and Wyoming). Given that many Americans can't name a country that starts with a "U", I think the right answer should have been "No idea!" (half credit for each of the inaccurate answers).

Other than that I think they nailed it. Man, I love my country!

I got 37% just because of that question and I use "Zee" for 'Z'.

(h/t to The Apostate.)